Were you making a statement about the value of the book for Christian men, or were you being clever and making a statement about the value of the church?

I agree that the Christian church is rather feminine in many ways. We think of churches–rightfully so, I think–as places where we find care and nurture, and those are often thought of a feminine characteristics. But what about things like forgiveness and teaching? We also find them at church–are they feminine?

You also say that Podles doesn’t focus on the present-day church, except to point out that it is “dominated by women.” So he offers no practical suggestions for making church more likable by men?

That’s right. Other than to stop preaching heresy, he doesn’t give any practical advice. For practical advice you can read Why Men Hate Going to Church by David Murrow.

This is not the first time I had read an article like this and it really surprises me that men are leaving the church claiming it is too feminine. What are the “man” qualities that are not in the church? And are these qualities that are supposedly missing in concert or conflict with the fruits of the spirit?

Nowadays it’s not enough to have a personal relationship with Jesus; many of today’s top speakers encourage men to have a passionate relationship with Him. These teachers have chosen a very uncomfortable metaphor to describe discipleship. Speaking as a man, the idea of having a passionate relationship with another man is just plain gross.
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If gets worse. More than once, I’ve been exhorted by a prominent men’s minister to have a love affair with Jesus. I just saw a new book for Christian men: Kissing the Face of God. An ad for the book invites men to “get close enough to reach up and kiss His face!” Time out–this is a men’s book? Yikes!

With imagery like that, it’s no surpise that men aren’t interested in church.

Looking at Podles list:

* separation
* self-sacrifice
* transcendence

I would say separation and transcendence are often missing. My wife and I j7ust had this discussion and one of her responses was “I don’t see how you can incorporate separation into church.” To which I responded that that was a very feminine thing to say. For example, if you have church women planning something, it seems to be that they commonly want to have collective participation and that the activity often involves bringing people into to work on something together. However, I like the idea of churches “separating” - forming small groups, even equipping individual believers for person study and personal worship. You only bring people together to support this separation-type practice - not the other way around.

Transcendence to me, is all about focusing on the abstract nature of God and simply contemplating him. David’s Selah if you will. Again, the activities in church are so often about doing small action-type things - pot-lucks, outreaches, etc.. what about simply contemplating the wonder of God? What about engaging the church in discussion and Q&A?

As for self-sacrafice this is a Christian quality. I read the point and intellectually comprehend it but just can not relate to it through personal experience.

I would say the answer is to ensure the focus of the church is biblically orthodox and the rest will fall into place.